Joseph

As I exited the burn unit at Barnes Hospital, I carried a very upset little guy who’d just had his face scrubbed of dead tissue to prevent scarring and to promote healing. Tears ceased, but soaked his shirt. I, too, was extremely frustrated after 4 hours, 3 waiting with paperwork and 1 of care. As I negotiated the maze of hallways to the parking garage, the two of us attracted numerous glances, for he was a black child carried by a white male. Approaching the tunnel to the garage, we were intercepted by an angel, a tiny hospital volunteer, all 4 feet 8 inches of her with more than 80 years of living experience.

“Now, now, who do we have here?” Our African American heavenly asked. She reached up and brushed away a few of the toddler’s remaining tears.

“This is Josh, my foster son,” I replied breaking a smile and ready to be in my car headed home.

She gently reached up pinching my shirt collar choking me, inviting my eyes down to her eye level. “He is your son and you call him son. You are his father … and don’t you ever forget that!” Her voice pleasant, full of compassion filled me. She released my shirt and smoothed a bit of the suave on Josh’s face. “Now the two of you have a good day.” She blessed us with a smile. I needed to hear her words. They have traveled within me since that day. Were there tougher days ahead? You bet!

While Mary was busy pondering, what was Joseph doing?

BAH! HUMBUG!

By Fred Vilbig

Maybe Ebenezer Scrooge had it right. Maybe we should listen to the Grinch … that is, before that pesky, silly Cindy Lu Who messed things up. If you look at it objectively, Christmas is one big exercise in self-absorption. “Buy me this!” “Get Me that!” And now we don’t even call it Christmas. I was recently in CostCo, and they were selling “Winter Holiday” gift baskets. No Christ in that Christmas!

The stories of Scrooge and the Grinch do seem to reach a satisfactory conclusion. Scrooge realized that being generous and charitable made him feel good about himself. The Grinch realizes that the Whos’ Christmas is about people caring for one another. Still, these strike me as an ultimately empty, self-serving accomplishment too. If our Winter Holiday is just an excuse to feel good about ourselves, then “Bah! Humbug!”

But in reality, Christmas is so much more than that.

Take this and drink....

Me:  Lord, it's me.
Jesus:  I'm here.
Me:  I had a question.
Jesus:  Ask away.
Me:  You know how the bread and wine become your body and blood during the consecration?
Jesus:  Yes.
Me:  Well, I just take the body, and I always skip drinking from the chalice.  Is that ok?
Jesus:  What do you think?
Me:  Well, I know that you are fully present in both forms, so I'm getting all of you either way.
Jesus:  True.
Me:  But then I ask myself, if you only wanted me to take the bread, you wouldn't have gone through the whole explanation of "this is my blood".  If you made such point to do both, why do I only participate in one?
Jesus:  I see your point.
Me:  The truth of the matter is, and I'm just being honest here, it seems kind of gross to me.  All of those people drinking from the same cup, all of the germs.  I mean, I know they wipe the rim down, but you can't tell me I'm not catching someone else's backwash.
Jesus:  I understand. 
Me:  Well, I guess that when I think about it, it feels a little selfish.  I mean there you are, up on that crucifix dying for me and I'm too much of a wimp to share a cup.  I feel like I'm not fully participating.
Jesus:  I see.
Me:  I think about you serving the lepars, or Veronica pressing her shroud against your wounds.  Now that I think about it, there are a lot of dirty jobs I tried to avoid in my life.  I never wanted to change a diaper, that's for sure.
Jesus:  But you did.
Me:  Yeah, I did.
Jesus:  Why?
Me:  Because I loved my daughter more than I hated what I thought was gross.
Jesus:  That makes sense.
Me:  And to be honest, I don't know if I'd have such a close bond with the people I love, if I didn't roll up my sleeves and do the tough stuff.  Putting aside my personal comfort to show them that I would do anything for them.  Cutting Dad's toenails when he was on hospice was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
Jesus:  I remember that.  It was beautiful.  You know who else saw you do that?
Me:  Who?
Jesus:  Your son.  You see, I care less about your physical habits and more about the intentions of your heart.  Whether you receive my body on your tongue, or in your hand, whether you take the cup and drink my blood or not, what matters to me is that you set aside your will for me.  When you told me years ago that you would put your own "self-made" plans aside and follow me, I asked you to leave all of your worldly comforts behind.  I'm asking you to do that again, each time you take me into your being, in the miracle of the Eucharist.  Do you understand what I'm asking of you?
Me:  I think so.
Jesus:  Amen.

Unbroken

As part of his senior leadership class last year, my son Ryan had to read a book. He gave the book to me and told me it would be worth my time to read. He was right. It took 7 years for the author Laura Hillenbrand to write it. Hillenbrand also wrote another best-seller called Sea Biscuit. The name of the book is “Unbroken”. The movie – also called Unbroken – will be released next month. It chronicles the life of an American hero named Louis Zamperini.

Louie was an Olympic athlete and WWII veteran. His story is about survival, resilience, and redemption. It is unlike anything you’ll probably ever see. But ultimately, it’s about his commitment to faith and his uncanny ability to forgive those who tortured him and tried to take away his dignity.

Back in 1998, the Winter Olympics took place in Nagano, Japan. CBS ran this story about the life of Zamperini. This inspirational video was shown at our last PX90 meeting, followed by some great discussion about everyday challenges we face as men and how we maintain our own dignity. I hope you have the time to watch it and appreciate the blessings in your life as you prepare for Thanksgiving. Like my son said to me when he handed me the book, “it will be worth your time”.

May God continue to bless you and your families. Happy Thanksgiving! Here is the incredible life story of Louie Zamperini:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEGL-wyz1yk

A Walk ...

Thoughts … slowly … of thanksgiving …

Fiery sun … invitation through forest … she’s sleeping … dreaming ...

         Stay in toasty bed … wander in nature’s cold … wonder?

Doc for the stretches relieving pain from my lower back.
Home … heat … cold … outdoors
                     cotton seed …  farmers … hoodie
                                                legs … independence … dependence … journey
                                fall red, orange, yellow and eyes to see them
A stranger … “good morning” … it is.
                                                constant ringing in my ears … I need healing … others need it more.
Fresh air … birds singing
                                13 notes … music … infinite compositions.
My daughter … students …  all children …
                                their curiosity … my curiosity.
                                                                                                we live.  we learn.  we play … fully alive?
26 letters … words … infinite stories

Quiet whispers … coincidence?

Wild beauty … rare … everywhere … worth protecting

Signs … 3 coon kits hug a sycamore staring … I pause, stare back

                                                          Stream trickles … water cycles from above … fresh, timeless, infinite
Family … friends … community … family … infinite
                                      Creation infinite … one God, one Spirit breaths in us all

love … conditional … Unconditional … Love

Cell phones … quantum mechanics … 2 bits … infinite information

Goodness … infinite

Deer scrounging acorns … homeless scrounging scraps

Love one richly … lose them … love’s infinite, timeless … loss a short time

laughter … compassion … hope …
                                fear … courage … perseverance
                                                touch … sensation … feelings …
                                                                                                tears … loss … joy
Wood pecker at eyelevel
                                roar above … 292 at 25000 ft … flight … infinite space
                                                Ripening of life and the wisdom to live and share it … memories
Geocache –GPS … 2 bits … names in order who pass this way
Peace - chaos choice … life-death choice

kingdom … Kingdom … both are here.  Which do I build?

Mystery … Paradox

Health … disease … cure … no cure
                tough ticket home
                                 destination known to One … unknown to all.
DNA … cells … complexity … simplicity
Racked bike … journeys to come …
                                                                               past … present … future.
Breakfast aroma … comfort … a new day ahead.

                                                                                                                        Morning sun … evening darkness

Thanks, God!

See January post for upcoming Thanksgiving event coming soon.

But The Snakes are Still Here!

By Fred Vilbig

In the book of Numbers, there is what I think is a strange story about what God did to the Israelites when they were in the desert. They had been eating manna and quail for quite some time. I would imagine that eating the same thing day after day would get old. It probably lost its taste and became unappetizing.

So the Israelites complained against God. In response, the Lord sent poisonous snakes among them. Many Israelites were bitten and died. The people then realized their mistake and repented. They asked Moses to pray to God for them. “Pray to the Lord to take away the serpents from us.” Numbers 21:7.

Moses prayed, and God answered their prayer, but not in the way they had hoped. Instead, God told Moses to sculpt a bronze serpent and put it on a pole. Whenever anyone was bitten by a snake, if they would just look at the bronze serpent, they would be healed. Numbers 21:8-9.

This just strikes me as strange. God did not take the snakes away like the Israelites had asked. He did not make the snakes non-poisonous. He did not stop the snakes from biting the Israelites.

He could have done any of those things, but He didn’t. He just gave them a cure.

Meet me in St. Louie!

I moved to St. Louis in 1972 as a one year old when my dad was transferred from Chicago. I grew up in St. Louis, went away to school, and came back to raise my family. However, it isn’t until now that I really appreciate how great our town is. If you look on the Chamber of Commerce or the Visitor Commission’s website, you will see all of these great bullet points about our city. It showcases the low cost of housing or the growing job market in healthcare, sciences and technologies. They mention how great our Zoo is, the cultural diversity, rich history, and thriving restaurant scene. We have professional football, hockey, and baseball teams. It’s a great place to live. But as I get older, the things I appreciate about the Lou is less about the Arch, and more about something else.

The people.

He ain't heavy.....

Being a kid in the 70’s was a special time. I’m the youngest of six kids in my family – 4 sisters and 1 brother. The summers always consisted of Indian ball, building forts, kick the can, swimming, building a golf course in our yard, bottle rocket fights (not recommended), catching tadpoles and keeping them until they turned into frogs, playing Jarts (also not recommended), ringing doorbells, truth or dare, etc. The winters were all about hockey. Remember the ugly black leather roller skates with the steel wheels? We had some great games in our neighborhood.

On Thanksgiving Day in 1971, in the words of Gus Kyle, we had a “barn burner.” I was wearing my #4 Boston Bruins jersey (you better know who that is) while my older brother Jimmy donned his typical Blues #5 Bobby Plager jersey. Jimmy always made sure we were on the same team. I was always looking to score. Jimmy was always looking to hip check his next victim. Near the end of our game, I had a breakaway with that stupid red plastic puck that bounced more than it slid. One of the older Slattery boys knocked me flying on the cold concrete. I cracked my elbow and was seething in pain. I held my big brother’s hand as he helped me up, crying uncontrollably. What happened next went down in St. Francis of Assisi School lore. Jimmy walked over to that Slattery kid, picked him up off his feet and threw him in his own front yard. The gloves dropped and a brawl broke out. Everyone got involved. One of the parents had to come out and break it up. The game quickly ended, but the message from Jimmy was crystal clear – you mess with my little brother, you mess with me. It was always like that for me growing up with Jimmy.

On October 8^th 2014, I once again held my big brother’s hand and was again crying hard - only this time the circumstances were much different.  Four weeks earlier, Jimmy was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer. My big brother was dying, and there wasn’t a thing I could do about it.

Parables in Life

Often, I witness the parables in action in my life and in the life of others. People have their favorite authors and hopefully some of those authors are reflective individuals of faith and spirituality. I find that extensions to scripture are written in quality works of fiction and nonfiction as well as in plays and motion pictures. Each morning, I start with a reading from the day’s scripture. As I place myself in the setting and environment of the passage, I roll time forward to present day and attempt to incorporate my story into the reading. Parables, limitless in possibilities and timeless in nature, are favorites. Frequently, I find them in literature and life. Because parables are so rich with possibilities, they were not meant to be fully understood, but to be engaging with everyone immersed!

Jesus telling stories was and is an attractive way to capture people’s attention. Jesus used parables for their universal, timeless appeal using the ‘familiar’ with people while also adding contrasts to their experiences. He was able to teach from parables while inviting people to invest themselves more fully than if he’d lectured them on values, morals, or ethics. He did not present a world of escapism from a power-driven, material world to some idyllic spiritual dimension. “God so loved the world that he gave his only Son …” (John 3:16). Jesus walked the earth seeing everywhere the signs of His heavenly Creator. He saw evil in the world, but He would overcome it.

The Annoynance of the Gospel

By Fred Vilbig


In 1972, there was a movie about St. Francis called “Brother Son, Sister Moon.” Basically, Francis was portrayed as a hippie. After returning from an unsuccessful military campaign, he becomes a nature lover. He rejects his father’s materialism and begins to sort of float through life. I get the impression that St. Francis lived according to the philosophy of self-fulfillment where you do what comes naturally. It’s wrong to resist those feelings.

The problem with this image is that it is a lie. Francis fell in love with Jesus. He was a true son of the Church. In order to control his passions, he fasted seven times a year for 40 days. That’s right; he had 7 Lents a year.

The annoyance of the Gospel is that Jesus did not only say, “Believe in the good news.” That would have been easy. Just believe. How simple!

But Jesus said, “Repent, and believe the good news.” Mark 1:15. Repentance and faith were intricately connected.

You really can’t have one without the other.

Get off the Sidelines

Did you now that since embarking on this endeavor, this playground for sharing ideas and thoughts, that there have been 42 blog posts.  I'm the lucky one who gets to read all of these before anyone else!  I want to specifically thank Ben, Fred, Tim and Sean for their dedication and perseverance in continually producing great material that always gets me thinking and focused again on the spiritual side of my journey through this world...

{Pause and wait for the applause to die down}

 There have been some very personal and vulnerable pieces shared, like this one from Sean, or this searching piece from Ben.  I love the imagery Tim creates in this piece, and we can always count on Fred to stir the pot!

But the post that has garnered the most interest - the one that still gives me chills when I read it - focuses on One Man and His Awakening.

Talk is Cheap

by Fred Vilbig

In the Epistle of James, the author criticizes those who say they are saved by faith alone. He points out that even the demons believe that there is only one God, but that does not save them. Rather, they shudder at the thought. He states clearly that man is justified by faith and works, and not by faith alone. James 2:31-46. Even Jesus talked about judging people based on what they have done. Matt. 25:31-46.

Luther hated the Epistle of James. He called it the “epistle of straw” because it conflicted with his doctrine of “sola fide” or “faith alone.” He felt that it was only by faith that we are saved. Works seem to be irrelevant to him.

As Catholics, we side with Jesus and James. Talk alone is cheap. You have to live your faith to make it real; otherwise, it’s just imaginary. We are known and will be judged by our actions. It goes without saying that our actions proceed from what we believe, but our beliefs alone are not enough.

So the question to all of us is, “What am I doing to make my faith real?” 

Paradox: can we live with Him?

I often face intriguing challenges from colleagues and friends who are either fundamentalists or do not believe God exists; questioning how I can live in Catholic faith especially when they consider much of the faith as “waffling in her understanding.” In today’s “data” driven mindsets, everything’s measured, tested and presented as if individuals or children are mere sets of algorithms. (some day stat folks will conclude people are far greater than the sums of their parts!!! Hopefully this conclusion arrives sooner rather than later.) Many have allowed concrete thought, certitudes to harden relationships and crystalize their spirituality. As a society, we witness politicians and the media sensationalize and polarize to extremes. Growing numbers of people would rather live in fundamental rigidity or denial of God’s existence, paralyzed to move forward until the “data” is in. Both groups fail to live fluidly in thought and faith. Mark Twain said, “It is not what you don’t know that harms you, it is what you know for certain – and it just ain’t true.” (As a Twain fan, I doubt his pronouncement of atheism … as he used paradox to refute fundamentalism but not a Creator… “Letters from the Earth” is a good read)
As I limit my understanding of Jesus with boundaries and I attempt to grow comfortable … a familiar (b/c I do this far too often) discomfort creeps from around the corner. Why? My faith, our faith and Jesus in it oozes with paradox. I find more people building comfortable boundaries … unwilling to live … to explore … to immerse themselves in Paradox. Paradox makes me uncomfortable. Paradox makes Church uncomfortable … and from discomfort comes growth!

A Thankful Heart

By Joe Guffey

As many of you know my son Patrick and his wife (Abby) had twin premature babies born in April at only 24 weeks. The babies, Emma and Owen (pictured above), went to Cardinal Glennon Hospital and are doing better with Owen going home 2 weeks ago (with high BP) and Emma (respiratory issues) hopefully to join him at home in late October.  The full extent of any damage or long-term problems are not known but we are so grateful for where they are now and how far they have come in 5 months.

But let me go back 5 months and shout a loud praise for my Px90 (Sean Walsh led) table mates and other Px90 friends. When the twins were born and we knew there were multiple ways this could turn out including one or both babies dying or being brain damaged etc.  I folded my hands and prayed really really hard; And then I opened my hands and typed a message to my fellow Px90 Men and said I need your prayers for my family.

Let me tell you their immediate responses and support and prayers were a God send during a very difficult time.  The Px90 men and this program are the best things to happen to me and have helped me grow in my faith and as a Catholic Man.

We see so many tragedies happening to other people and always think wow that is too bad- I hope they are okay and say a quick prayer - and then move on - understandable of course.  But when the tragedy or dramatic event is at your own doorstep you want and need all the support and prayers you can get.  And let me tell you the Px90 men stepped up and continue to pray for Emma & Owen and my family and to ask about them and provide me with encouragement that everything will be okay. And I have shared with Patrick & Abby the emails of support and prayers and that has lifted them up knowing so many people are asking God for help.

I know "real men" don't cry but I have to confess to shedding some tears when I received the many emails of prayers and support from my group and to know I was not alone in this fight -- So THANK YOU Catholic men of Px90 for being living examples of Jesus' love and strength and may God always bless you and be with your family and you.

Post Season - The Cardinal Way

Some things are a constant with the changing season in St. Louis.  Relief from the humid summer, the colors of the leaves, and the Cardinals heading towards October baseball.

I remember listening to Jack Buck on a small radio in my back yard with my Dad and brother.  My mom made a makeshift tray with shoulder straps and "sold" hot dogs and drinks to us since we couldn't afford to go down to Busch Stadium.  We would hang on to every called strike.

My memory is not selective.  I remember some real droughts in the 90s when my beloved redbirds were struggling to be competitive.  But they also have given me some of the best memories of my life.  Who doesn't remember where they were for Ozzie's home run, hearing, "Go Crazy folks!  Go Crazy!"  The home run race between McGuire and Sosa.  The Pujols' home run in Houston against Brad Lidge.  Or the infamous game 6.  Miracles happened that night.  I was there.  I'll never forget it.

Comfort in the Silence

Unfortunately it is not often I get to sit in silence.  I wake to an alarm, get out of bed to the hustle and bustle of a working spouse, 5 kids getting ready for school, 2 dogs with tails wagging and a boisterous stomach.  Then it's off to work were phone calls, emails, meetings and reports consume 8 hours in what seems like 15 minutes.  Back at home it's dinnertime - one of my favorite times of the day for sure, but it definitely cannot be described as silent.  Next comes practices,  games, meetings, grocery shopping, etc.  Maybe a half hour of reading or a soccer match on the tely; 2 oreos, a glass of milk, and my head hits the pillow exhausted. Lather, rinse and repeat...

With all the commotion of my life, when I am finally able to sit in silence for a few minutes I find myself a little uneasy with the inactivity - a restlessness is there that slowly flows into my thoughts, a feeling that I should be doing something.

Can it be that I am no longer comfortable in the Silence?

Bad Business

By Fred Vilbig

In accounting, your numbers don’t always add up. You total everything up, and the numbers are a little off. That can happen in something as simple as your checkbook or as complicated as a spreadsheet for $1 billion conglomerate corporation. It happens all the time on inventory when things just disappear.

If the discrepancy is less than 1%, or maybe even as much is 5%, rather than wasting untold hours trying to find the math error or the transposed number, accountants employ a time honored practice of inserting a “plug” number. Taking time to find that missing number or item would just be bad business.

If you think about it, God is a bad businessman. Jesus asks the question, “Which one of you, having 100 sheep and losing one of them, does not leave the 99 in the wilderness and go after the one that is lost, until he finds it?” Luke 15:4

The answer is no one in their right mind. Why for the sake of one sheep would you jeopardize 99 others by leaving them to predators and thieves in the wilderness? Bad business!

it's coming ... opportunity ... He's knocking ...

Christ the King Catholic Church - San Diego

Bombarded with sensational headlines and instant messaging, people take little time to digest quality information to discover its essence.  Like the seed sowed on rocky ground, while being rootless, it lasts only a short while.  We all wish there were formulas to prescribe a means to a stronger faith, similar to a precise mechanic’s manual.   But man is too complex for an “operator’s manual.”  The best men can offer is to be present, to be in touch with one another.

“Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father.” (John 14:9)  Jesus’ words irritated many in the Jewish community.  Jesus rose from this earth leaving no body to account for the Spirit of God to an unbelieving world … only befuddled, sinful disciples remained, who abandoned Him even denying Him on a cross.

            We are the living remnant, the Body of Christ, Jesus left on earth.  He did not leave an owner’s manual … no “one” way … no “right” way.  But if you want to experience “a way,” come listen to some men’s journeys.  We are the present, the living community to personify, to represent Jesus to the world.  Paul did not say the people of God are “like the Body of Christ.”  Throughout his ministry he said we are the body of Christ.  The Spirit, a gift of the Father dwells among us … and the world knows of the unseen God by our representation of Him, as the extended Body of Christ.

The men of Holy Infant parish invite you to PX-90, 90 minutes in Christ, Sept. 27, to strengthen your faith, to be a formative limb of the Body of Christ.  Men offer a dynamic program actively nurturing each other along the faith journey.

Man's Best Friend

What is it about dogs?  Why does it seem at times, easier to love an animal then a human?  There are countless stories about the bond of man to his loyal companion. 

Fido was born in Italy sometime during World War II.  He was found on the verge of death by a kiln worker who took him home and nursed him back to health.  And for this, he'd have Fido's unwavering loyalty for the rest of his life.  Every day, Fido waited for his master at the same bus stop, refusing to move until he stepped off the bus - and this at a time when Italy was being bombed almost daily.  But one day, Fido's master didn't return. He'd been killed in an air raid while at work.  Fido, ever vigilant, still turned up to wait for him.  Every day.  For 14 years.  Surviving footage shows huge crowds watching him make his way to the bus stop every day, watch everyone get off, then walk away disappointed when the bus pulled off.

A 66 year old Florida man saw his dog get grabbed from the side of a pond by a 7 foot alligator.  Without hesitation, he jumps into the water and wrestles the gator and got his dog back.

Love can drive us to do amazing things.  And a love that is not complicated with ego and expectations has an even stronger bond.  Your dog loves you unconditionally.  He doesn’t care what you look like, how much money you make, or how long you’ve been away.  When you come home, he is there, happy to see you.

The love that your dog has for you is the same type of love the God has for each of us and the love we are called to share with those around us.

Below is a song from a book I used to read the kids.  The author knows exactly what I'm talking about.   

Could You Love Me A Little Less?

By Fred Vilbig

In the movie “Evan Almighty”, the main character is in his yard reflecting on what God is asking of him. He looks up and says, “I know, I know. Everything you do, you do because you love me.” At that point, his sprinkler comes on and squirts him in the face. Evan continues: “Do me a favor; love me less.”

As Christians, we believe that God is in charge of everything, so that nothing happens without His involvement in some way. Of course, we can always freely choose to sin, and He is not involved in that, but even the consequences of sin are in some way under His control. Nothing exists without God causing it to exist at any given moment.

A Love Letter

Many of you have probably experienced the dreaded day when you take your child away to college. Our oldest will start her 3rd year at Kansas University. She left Sunday. Yesterday, my wife and I took our son to Quincy University. We arrived late morning and didn't leave until almost 7:00 p.m. Just like I did with his older sister, I handed him a manilla envelope at the moment we left. Enclosed was a picture of him on my shoulders when he was five. The envelope also contained a love letter. Sometimes it's easier to express words on paper than it is face to face. I wanted him to know how much he is loved.....and that he is never alone.

Son,

I miss you already. As you’re reading this, I’m probably reminiscing about all the Father/Son times we’ve shared together. Countless memories and so many more to come. So thus it begins – the next chapter for Ryan Walsh. This is a big one. You’re ready. You know it, and I know it. My daily prayer for you is always the same – “Lord, may Ryan be prepared physically and mentally for the challenges he will face. May he be prepared to make the necessary sacrifices that will make him a better man. And may he continue to be a good and faithful servant.”

Vacation

Jesus exclaimed: “I give praise to you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, for although you have hidden these things from the wise and the learned you have revealed them to the childlike ….” Mt 11:25

My parents didn’t have much. They always socked a little money aside each month to save for our family vacation. Venturing from our tiny western Kansas community, Dad searched for hotels with pools … and if one had a slide; my sisters and I were fish in wonderland! We collected General Mills cereal box bottoms and headed to the “big city” to redeem them 3/ticket for KC Royals bleacher seats among local diehards. Skyscrapers poking clouds, too many people to count, and new cultures to visit excited us.

Brotherhood

I was catching an early morning flight to D.C.  Coffee in hand, I settled in and decided to enjoy the new freedom of using my phone in airplane mode while we took off.  I have a podcast app and one of my subscriptions is for Ted Talks.  The one that caught my eye was "Why Soldiers Miss War" by Sebastian Junger.

The question when posed seems ridiculous.  Why would someone want to return back to chaos, fear, danger, and death?  Does that really happen?  As it turns out, it does.  Its a common phenomenon.  There are reports of men in army hospitals going AWAL, escaping out of windows or sneaking out of doors to return to their unit on the front.  Why?  Are they crazy?  As it turns out that after interviews and studies the answer became clear:

Brotherhood

Brotherhood is different than friendship.  It has nothing to do with feelings.  Its an agreement.  An agreement that says you will put the welfare of the group, ahead of your own needs.  I love these other people, more than I love myself.

When soldiers come home, they don't have that connection anymore.  They don't know where they are safe.  Who they can trust, who has their back.  In comparison to that, war seems easy.  So they long to go back.

I wonder if we can change.  If we can have a brotherhood that rather than assembled out of the necessities of war and survival,  is based on our beliefs and ideologies.  If Christ showed us through His great example what it was like to lay down his life for his brothers, are we not called to do the same?

Ask yourself who you really trust.  Do you have a group of men, that no matter what, would be there for you if things really got bad?  Are you that kind of brother to other men?  If our goal at PX90 falls short of creating that level of fellowship, then we have failed.   And some of us will go back to dark and sinful places looking for it.

Jesus, be our Rock

I recently finished a book called "Under the Overpass" by Mike Yankoski. It is the true story of 2 college age kids, Mike and his buddy Sam, who decided to live on the streets and experience life homeless. Mike's account of the situations he and Sam experienced and the people they encountered is compelling on many levels. What struck me the hardest was the courage to step outside of their comfort zones and follow what they saw as a call from Christ.

"The first night on the streets of D.C., when it felt like Sam and I had dropped into oblivion, I prayed a desperate prayer: "Jesus, be our Rock." And He was. Even though the months brought more challenges than we could have imagined, even though we came to the end of ourselves again and again, Jesus held us safe in His power. And He will do the same for you, too.

What if following Him is hard? What if along the way He asks you to accomplish difficult tasks or to overcome intimidating obstacles? What if it requires more of you than you have to give?

World Cup Passion

It was a Sunday morning in 1974 when I first experienced it. I was 12 years old. My Dad took me to the Kiel Center to watch it live via satellite. West Germany vs. Holland – the World Cup final. Two international soccer powerhouses going at it. Simmons, Brock and Unger were replaced by Cruyff, Beckenbauer and Muller. My passion for a sport I loved grew stronger. And passion is a strange thing. I’m more careful now about what my passion is, and what God’s passion is for me.

The 2014 World Cup is over. The Germans reign as kings. I’ve watched World Cup matches for 40 years. This year’s has been the most entertaining tournament. Great goals, great drama. The images of Brazilian fans crying as the Germans dissected their team will remain etched in my mind. What passion they have for their team. The expectations are the same every World Cup for Brazil. Anything less than winning is a failure – especially when you’re playing at home. What a painful experience to see their love and passion turn to tears. Excruciating.

Discerning a Path

A good friend of mine recently told me of some struggles he's having over an issue in his life.  He's been praying and praying to God, but has not been able to hear God's voice lead Him to the right path.  This friend says his prayers have been like "wrestling with God" - full voice appeals, wringing of hands, impatience and intensity building. He is seeking God's will, and is asking God to light the way to follow - but God seems to be silent on the matter.

What advice would you give?

Held Hostage

Recently, while running a charitable 5K, one of our team members, a Catholic, spoke harshly about the Church … and rightfully so. Though unrelated to his personal experience and situation, he tethered his justification and logic for abandoning his faith additionally to the sexual abuse by clergy punctuated with the Bishop’s poor comments related to incidents recently accented by the media. I, too, am angered by crimes committed against children as I am about anyone committing crimes against them. I can understand the mistrust people feel because the perpetrators in these instances are men they trusted freely and unconditionally. My friend has every right to be bitter toward representatives of the Church with respect to his situation. However, coupling his pain to unrelated negative events impedes clarity. What he has failed to realize is that these very painful events own him. He does not own the situation, but is held hostage to it.

As a long time sponsor of the Fellowship of Christian Athletes in the school where I teach, I am reminded of a session designed by the students pertaining to critical attributes associated with successful relationships. Though the boys were engaged, the girls devoted the most work into making the meeting thoughtful and provoking. They gathered questionnaires and lists from popular sources describing these special attributes. The collective “top five” attributes surprised me; not what made the list but what did not make any list.  A youngster immediately spoke, “Forgiveness should be a top five attribute,” unfortunately missing from the popular lists.

The Graduate

This time of year, you see a lot of balloons on mailboxes and extra cars in driveways.  Graduation parties.  Back in my day, when you graduated from high school you got a diploma and your old man let you get an extra quarter pounder at McDonalds.  "Can we get a 20 piece McNuggets?"  "Let's not go crazy son."

Now I was renting a band and catering food for my oldest daughter's accomplishment of surviving high school.  I don't mind.  I had the same look on my face that the other dad's had at the three other parties I went to last weekend.  My baby girl is growing up.  The celebration was less a reward for passing four years of academics, and more of a gesture of gratitude and encouragement.  Gratitude for the joy of raising her and encouragement for her to leave the nest.

I wonder sometimes if God looks on me with that same fatherly love.  The joy that comes from sharing a life with me, and encouragement for me to some day leave this world and move on to the next.  We might not all get diplomas, but we are all in His classroom, learning our lessons and experiencing our own graduations.

So go buy some balloons.  Put out a party tray of food, fill up the coolers and invite family and friends over to celebrate!

Proverbs 22:6  "Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it."

It's All Grace

by Fred Vilbig

My daughter, Karyn, graduated from Notre Dame this spring. That in itself is something any parent should be proud of. But it is the back story that is even more amazing.

Karyn enrolled at Notre Dame when my business was doing well. But as the economy derailed, so did my business. We couldn’t afford to send her there. I started sending the financial aid office monthly reports showing how things were slipping, but they were not impressed. I encouraged Karyn to go to the Grotto at Notre Dame and pray the rosary. My wife started praying to St. Jude. Nothing worked, and we had to pull her out. She was really devastated.

But she didn’t give up.

Operation Overlord

Keeping your promises to others is important - especially your children. So after my youngest daughter served mass, I promised her a pancake breakfast at IHOP. As we waited for our table, a very old man slowly strolled in and sat near us. His  heavily decorated hat caught my attention. I couldn't see the inscription on his medals, but I clearly saw the embroidered "WWII Veteran" smack dab in the middle of his hat. Overwhelmed in that moment, I rose and walked over to him. I introduced myself, shook his hand and thanked him for his service to our country. He thanked me for what he called "my kindness". My final words to him were "May God continue to bless you." This made an impression on my daughter who thought that I knew the man. As we ate our breakfast, I explained to her how important the men and women of our military are for their sacrifices and service. Needless to say, the pancake breakfast had much more emphasis than I had anticipated.

Our Lord's Barber - Pentecost

     Parting his hair, I cracked the layered crust the curvature of a golf ball. A miniature maggot colony writhed inside releasing a pungent odor. Others huddled close as I cut hair removing the serum-forming dome concealing the boy’s head wound. He stared passively while his mother appeared relieved anticipating a holiday photo at the next station.  Another guest awaited my clippers as Family Services escorted the mother and her young son aside.

“Drama, huh?” A tall, muscular Nigerian sat waiting bibbed and patient.

World's Best Dad

As Father's day approaches I typically find myself reviewing my performance as a Dad over the last 12 months to see if I truly deserve the cards, special treatment, and affection.

My oldest is heading to college now, so this is my 18th Father's Day and as this one comes to pass, I've come to a not so politically correct assessment.  We are spoiling our kids.

Most of the men reading these posts are careful about not having material possessions dominate their lives or their family's lives.  I'm not talking about buying them a pony or an Xbox One.  I'm talking about spending too much quality time with our children.

No Sin is Personal

by Fred Vilbig

World events are disturbing. Russia is encroaching on its European neighbors. It is also encroaching on Japanese territory. China is encroaching on Vietnamese territorial waters, and the Vietnamese are responding with water cannons – for now. Syria is descending into hell, and neither side really looks to be morally justified. In Africa, many nations are experiencing either Civil War or national war with their neighbors. And it just seems to me that a single spark could ignite a worldwide fire.

Are You Equipped?

by Margaret Bommarito

God equips those He calls. As a parent, this is crucial information! If we’re honest with ourselves, we don’t know what we are doing much of the time. God is also very polite, and waits to be invited. It takes great humility, and an awareness of our shortcomings, to ask for, and expect, our daily bread.

During the winter of her junior year of High School, my daughter mentioned interest in a school service trip to Mexico for Spring Break. Pride. We attended the informational meeting. Fear. The location, deep within the center of the country, is 9 hours from phone service or a hospital. Even something as simple as appendicitis could be fatal. Four years prior a senior had died from an accident on a similar service trip. Terror. Yes, this week-long immersion trip held life changing possibilities but we couldn’t get past our fears. We hoped that the rustic details – dirt floors, no indoor plumbing would discourage our spider-fearing daughter. It didn’t. We gathered more details from a priest who has made the trip several times, and from the parent of a previous participant. Our fears only increased by what we learned.

We would have to say no.

The Crucifixion

By Fred Vilbig

Did Jesus have to die on the Cross? That question came up this morning at Bible study. Someone asked whether Christ’s Passion and death were “enough” (and I’ll leave that topic for another blog) for all of the sins that have been and will ever be committed? Was it enough to overcome all of the indifference towards God? The selfishness in our world?

The question suggests that God is a harsh judge waiting to mete out justice on us, His creatures. He is waiting for His pound of flesh from us, and to stave him off, Jesus offered Himself. But is it enough?

I don’t see God that way.

Engage

During the period of silence following Communion, I nestled in the pew along with a full house. Through Holy Infant’s signature stained glass, rays of April sunshine showered upon us. Monsignor Buchheit’s attention stirred as a distraction, a man stood in an aisle from the back quarter of the church. Dressed in blue jeans with a cowboy hat tucked beneath his arm, the man walked the aisle approaching the podium. As he climbed the altar steps, Monsignor Buchheit rose, concern written across his brow. With open palm raised, the man waved to our priest for affirmation.

The man appeared even stranger as he faced the congregation. A jigsaw of stitches mended severe cuts enclosed in dark bruises, masking the stranger.

"Good Friday"

What is so "Good" about Friday?  Our loving God sends his son into this world as an example of how to treat one another and live our lives.  How do we thank our Lord for this perfect role model?  We ridicule, torture, and murder him.  He offers his son to us in a gesture of love and this is how we repay him?

And we call Friday "Good"???

Be Not Afraid

What are you afraid of? We all have fears. For instance, I can’t sing. I’m terrible. I’ve never sang in my life. So naturally, you’d think I would avoid singing. Well, not so. I do sing once a year. I do it for the teachers at Holy Infant. I even did it once at the Father/Daughter 7^th grade dinner. It started back in 2009 when I was on School Board. I wrote lyrics to a famous song for Sr. Rosario and the teachers. It seems that bad singing and silly lyrics are well liked. So there I stand with a stupid grin on my face every year bellowing out new lyrics. The joy is at my expense. What do I care? The walls of pride are down. I can get through the fear by knowing it brings joy to others.

So what are you afraid of?

I'm Awake Now

I've got a friend in the parish, Adam.  I'd guess that he is in his mid-thirties - a big, muscular guy.  I think he told me once he played football in college.  Adam was one of the finalists in the arm-wrestling tournament we had at PX90 a few weeks back (yes, we have arm-wrestling at PX90 - ask Bob Phillips what that's all about).  Adam and his wife are active in the parish.  She is currently going through RCIA; He plays basketball on Monday nights, is a regular at PX90, and goes to most of the Men's Club events.

Adam sent me an email the other day, and I can't seem to get it out of my mind.  It gives me chills each time I read it (which has been a few times a day).  I asked if I could share it, and Adam courageously agreed. 

I usually am extremely regimented in the morning on the series of tasks that I have to achieve in order to get out the door at the specific time I need to in order to get to the office by 7 a.m. so that I can start my day. My job runs at an extremely fast pace, more so than any other job I have had in the sales profession I would say. I feel that if I am not in early and focused, I lose money. The mornings are always stressful it seems.

A funny thing happened to me this morning...

The Weapons of War

By Fred Vilbig

I am now reading a book about St. John Vianney, the Cure of Ars. When he was first assigned to the tiny village of Ars (population about 250), he found a very secular community. Although there were several pious souls, the ravages of the French Revolution and Napoleon Bonaparte were quite evident. Few people attended Mass. In fact, Sundays seemed to have been reserved for country dances and drinking.

Fr, Vianney was a devout and simple soul who was greatly troubled about the condition of the spiritual lives of his parishioners. So he brought out the 2 biggest weapons in his arsenal: prayer and fasting. He would spend hours in prayer at night, sleeping very little. A rosary was never far from his hands, with many in his pockets to hand out to anyone willing to take one.

And his fasting was epic.

A Piano Man and His Monkey

Unable to let go of impending work filled with requirements and timelines, I sat quietly, though impatiently in a chapel along with a few others awaiting our host on an obligatory three day retreat. I’d committed to the shortest time required. I considered it a blessing our meeting time ended at noon. After lunch, I’d planned to substitute work I needed to complete during the designated time I was to be contemplative with Christ during our retreat. After all, I could contemplate Him any time I wanted and He’d understand. He’s always around … right?

Morning sunlight through the stained glass radiated dust suspended in the air. Interrupting my busy mind, a priest from Kalamazoo, Michigan … with a small monkey seated on his shoulder, hobbled across the room. Perhaps in his late forties, he used a cane to assist him for a leg he’d lost earlier in life. He silently settled on a piano bench with his back to us while he faced the altar. The monkey hopped to perch on the bench’s edge to stare at us mirroring our stare at him.

Greetings from Medjugorje

It's a beautiful morning.  The sun is warming the cold morning air as buses and pilgrims bustle back and forth.  We're in Medjugore, in the southern part of Herzegovina.  Like Fatima, Guadeloupe, and Lourdes, this is a place where Mary has been appearing to seven children for 33 years.  But these appearances are still going on.  We are staying at the house of Mirijana, one of the visionaries.  Being surrounded by so many devote Catholics might be part of the euphoria that stands in stark contrast to our daily lives back home.  My wife came years ago and had a life changing experience.  A true conversion of heart, and a new found devotion to God, His son, and our Mother.

Has God been in your life recently?

By Jim St. Louis

Has God been in your life recently? In what ways has He been present? What God moments have you had in your life?

I have been reading a few different books and pieces of Catholic literature lately and a question was asked of me. But before I get to that, how has God made Himself known to you in the past. For me He has been active in my life through other people, whether it has been a text by friend when I have been down or a quick hello from a friendly face. He manifested Himself one time when my wife and I couldn’t afford our groceries that week with a neighbor inviting us over for dinner not knowing our situation or a different friend giving us the extra bounty from their vegetable garden that week. Or during those stressful times when Deb and I are stretched so thin with getting the kids everywhere they need to be that a friend takes one of the kids for a time and it eases our schedule. During these times, especially the ones where I have had no money, I have prayed for deliverance. Or times of pain and depression I have prayed to be lifted up.

Who has been used by God’s hand in your life?

A Better World - One Man At A Time

Once upon a time there was a very successful business owner. His company had faithfully served millions of customers for many, many years. But lately, business had not been so good, and his competitors were just waiting for him to fail. For weeks and months, the man pondered the crisis, but the problems were so complex, and solutions seemed nowhere to be found.

Everyone was wondering what would happen to this great company, so finally the businessman announced that he was hosting a dinner for all his employees to unveil a plan that would save the company and return it to its former glory. He wanted to convey to them how important each person was to the future success of the organization.

The morning of the dinner, he was sitting in his study at home working on his speech, when his wife came in and asked if he would mind watching their son for a few hours while she ran some errands. He was about to say, "I really need to focus on finishing my speech," but something caught his tongue and he found himself agreeing, reluctantly.

Trust In God

by Fred Vilbig

As I am writing this, Putin is taking over the Crimea. There are mass protests in Venezuela over what socialism has wrought there. Syria is experiencing a Civil War. There are ongoing conflicts in a number of African nations with tens of thousands of deaths in recent years. There was a bombing in a Russian train station and an organized stabbing in a Chinese train station.

In the Church, we have the Vatican Bank scandal which from a distance seems to involve fraud and corruption. We have the “Bishop of Bling” in Germany, and I hear that the name is being applied also to a Bishop in Newark, New Jersey. And then there is the ongoing sex scandal involving priests and primarily young boys (yes, it is primarily homosexual in nature no matter what the New York Times’ editorial board wants you to think).

In the midst of all of this, it is hard sometimes to find God.

Not I

“From dust to dust you shall return” … not the words a father of a young child wants to hear. A marked man, ashes cross my forehead while thoughts of original sin … sin of the community of which I belong re-cycle through my mind. Each year, I am reminded of the sin I am born into and for which I am complicit during the Lenten season and introduced on Ash Wednesday.

“Not I,” I naturally deny, offended anyone would suggest it so. It’s easier to digest watching the crucified Christ than it is to admit to driving the nails. My stomach turns as I raise the hammer and avoid all possible eye contact with the Creator. As I crucify Him, am I proclaiming myself god by action? 

The world needs Fathers

More than ever, this world needs Fathers.


Fathers willing to get up before dawn for a long drive to a long day at a job he may not love, to benefit a family that he most certainly does. Fathers who swing a hammer, crunch numbers, or soothe angry customers — a thousand back-breaking or mind-numbing tasks, strung together into one endless struggle. Fathers who don’t mind the long drive home, a quick supper, and a rush to throw pop flies until his arm loses feeling and the day loses light. Fathers who will stay up past midnight, tolerantly teaching algebra. And Fathers willing to get up and do it all again.

PRAYERFUL GIANT

I remember it like it was yesterday. March 1985. I was a Senior at Mizzou majoring in Broadcast Journalism. The entire year was spent working at KBIA radio & KOMU-TV covering sports and news. No classroom work. Just working in the field. Challenging, yet fun. 

So imagine the excitement I had when I obtained a press pass to cover the Cardinals in St. Petersburg, FL for my spring break. What a blessing. I was so lucky. Even better, my entire family made the trip that week. We had a blast. Mom and Dad were thrilled to have us all together. My Dad was amazing. With only a high school degree, Dad was a minor league pitcher with the Giants organization. He got as far as Double A. He became a very successful car salesman, a hotel manager, and retired as Vice President and General Manager of Jefferson Savings & Loan. On this day in 1985, he was walking around the Cardinals clubhouse with me. No press pass for Dad. He was good friends with Smokin' Joe Cunningham - Cardinals Sales Director and former player, and Whitey Herzog. Dad walked around and just talked with everyone - Herzog, Ozzie, Jack Buck, etc. He cherished these moments. What an impression he made on me.

The Sower and the Soil

So I was driving into work one morning, listening to the scripture podcast from my Laudate App  on my phone, and the Gospel for that day was the parable of the Sower and the Soil - Mark, Chapter 4.  Every time I hear this parable, I try to think about which type of growing environment I am providing for God's word - am I the path, the rocky ground, the thorny bush, or the rich soil.  Oh how I want to be the rich soil!