Not I

“From dust to dust you shall return” … not the words a father of a young child wants to hear. A marked man, ashes cross my forehead while thoughts of original sin … sin of the community of which I belong re-cycle through my mind. Each year, I am reminded of the sin I am born into and for which I am complicit during the Lenten season and introduced on Ash Wednesday.

“Not I,” I naturally deny, offended anyone would suggest it so. It’s easier to digest watching the crucified Christ than it is to admit to driving the nails. My stomach turns as I raise the hammer and avoid all possible eye contact with the Creator. As I crucify Him, am I proclaiming myself god by action? 

The world needs Fathers

More than ever, this world needs Fathers.


Fathers willing to get up before dawn for a long drive to a long day at a job he may not love, to benefit a family that he most certainly does. Fathers who swing a hammer, crunch numbers, or soothe angry customers — a thousand back-breaking or mind-numbing tasks, strung together into one endless struggle. Fathers who don’t mind the long drive home, a quick supper, and a rush to throw pop flies until his arm loses feeling and the day loses light. Fathers who will stay up past midnight, tolerantly teaching algebra. And Fathers willing to get up and do it all again.

PRAYERFUL GIANT

I remember it like it was yesterday. March 1985. I was a Senior at Mizzou majoring in Broadcast Journalism. The entire year was spent working at KBIA radio & KOMU-TV covering sports and news. No classroom work. Just working in the field. Challenging, yet fun. 

So imagine the excitement I had when I obtained a press pass to cover the Cardinals in St. Petersburg, FL for my spring break. What a blessing. I was so lucky. Even better, my entire family made the trip that week. We had a blast. Mom and Dad were thrilled to have us all together. My Dad was amazing. With only a high school degree, Dad was a minor league pitcher with the Giants organization. He got as far as Double A. He became a very successful car salesman, a hotel manager, and retired as Vice President and General Manager of Jefferson Savings & Loan. On this day in 1985, he was walking around the Cardinals clubhouse with me. No press pass for Dad. He was good friends with Smokin' Joe Cunningham - Cardinals Sales Director and former player, and Whitey Herzog. Dad walked around and just talked with everyone - Herzog, Ozzie, Jack Buck, etc. He cherished these moments. What an impression he made on me.

The Sower and the Soil

So I was driving into work one morning, listening to the scripture podcast from my Laudate App  on my phone, and the Gospel for that day was the parable of the Sower and the Soil - Mark, Chapter 4.  Every time I hear this parable, I try to think about which type of growing environment I am providing for God's word - am I the path, the rocky ground, the thorny bush, or the rich soil.  Oh how I want to be the rich soil!

The Problem of Pain

St. Thomas Aquinas said that when all is said and done, there are only two reasons why people do not believe in God. The first itself has several variations, but it’s basically that we think that we don’t need God. Everything is working just fine without Him. Why interject a Divine Being? There is a scientific variation of this that we considered at PX90 when we talked about apologetics. I think that we saw that even science disproves this argument.

There’s also a kind of lazy, apathetic version of this argument. We just don’t want to make the effort as long as things are going well. Of course, this argument collapses in the face of catastrophes.

The fundamental response to this position is the restlessness of the human spirit. No matter what we do, we are never at peace; we are always looking for more. It’s kind of like being a drug addict. The next time around, the last fix just won’t be enough. We need more and more until we end up dead.