*dedicated to all of those who have lost especially loved ones during this pandemic.
During the pandemic turbulence of sensationalism, cancellations, conspiracy theories and tragic loss of life, I found myself walking the road to Emmaus, one I’ve walked before. A stranger dressed for rain joined me. He asked, “What’s running through your mind as you walk along?” Luke 24:13
So much was running through my mind. I didn’t know where to start. I listened to our steps on the wet pavement.
“I’ve run into a few fleeing Jerusalem, headed to Emmaus, tonight,” the stranger observed.
“A lot of folks have scattered out of there, today. A man named Jesus was unjustly accused, tortured, crucified and …” Graphic images churned my stomach. I felt despair, ashamed.
“And?” the stranger pried.
“The masses publicly humiliated him while he hung stripped of all human dignity, no clothes, no respect for his mother or the people who liked the guy. Then they jeered mocking him to come down off the cross. To save himself like he said he would.” Anger surged. “Some lady shouted, ‘Lazarus raised from the dead was all smoke and mirrors!’”
“What happened?”
“At one time, Lazarus raised from the dead was good enough for me,” I professed.
“No, what happened to Jesus?”
“He just hung there and died like anybody else. He didn’t save anybody, not even himself,” I stated feeling mislead. Perhaps, the falling mist clearing the atmosphere would clear my mind.
The stranger offended me, casually rattling off his next statement. “One of the thieves hanging next to your Jesus can acquit himself better than you.” I stopped aggressively searching the stranger’s eyes. Without flinching, he stated directly, “I heard the ignorant crook recognized Jesus as the Son of God right there. Sounds to me, you gave up hope when Jesus was crucified.”
Feeling defensive, I recoiled. “Three days earlier, Jesus had twelve disciples when he was arrested. The last man standing was a lone disciple Jesus asked to care for his mother. Where were the crowds supporting him?”
Attempting to absolve myself, I reconciled. “I was at the Sermon on the Mount. Jesus told of lifting the down-trodden, flipping the norm with gifts of the beatitudes. (Luke 24:13-35) He fed the hungry, cured the sick and the lame, drove out addictions, demons, forgave sins, changed water to wine, brought sight to the blind….”
“So, if Jesus did do all those things, what are you afraid of?”
“I’m afraid of death and everything associated with it. Fear of being rejected, of not being good enough, of losing everything, of failure, of loneliness, loss of health, friendship, my reputation, security.” I kicked a stone on the wet pavement spraying water before us. “Consider our vast poverty, justice to the highest bidder or slickest talker, terrorism, medical care to the wealthy, the lust of greed and power, abuse of immigrants which now includes the two of us as we scatter from Jerusalem.” I scoffed, “I often wonder when enough is enough?”
“Sounds like this Jesus-guy entered the muck and the folks he served took it to him!” The stranger walloped the stone bouncing it over a wooden bridge we began to cross. “You’re telling me Jesus chose to serve in the midst of betrayal and denial, division and deceit, in the ugliness of the world on his own journey. He’s stripped of everything; pleasures, clothing, honor, friendship; and then sentenced to death. As he suffers, naked, he is mocked. Why do people act so cruelly?”
“I find it interesting,” my companion continued. “I’ve been told Jesus repeated often, ‘Do not be afraid.’” We passed beneath a street light chasing our shadows into darkness. “Ironic, isn’t it? You seem to be headed into the darkness away from the light where nobody can see you. Chance you’re wondering whether you’re headed in the right direction?”
As we climbed a hill, mere silhouettes in the darkness, I was glad to fade into night.
“I heard a teacher, say that ‘fundamentally, fear of death is at the root of all sin, of all evil, including original sin.’1 I must admit he made a very compelling case. Half the humans that ever lived died under the age of 5; war, horrible diseases, genocide, hunger, all assaults on humanity.2 I wonder,” the stranger asked pausing me with a tap to my shoulder, “if the Author of all life, of all creation and beauty came again, would people kill him again?”3
“Betrayal by an intimate friend, disciples sleeping with indifference, false testimony when witnesses speak, indifferent to the truth, denials by friends,” I recited. “Is that me? Am I ignorant? Am I blind? Do I not recognize Jesus for who he is?”
“Appears to me, as Jesus walked the streets of Jerusalem, all sin converged upon him. Jesus freely carried it up the cross. Then, he dropped a torpedo at evil’s core. Raised on a cross of greed vs generosity, lust vs love, despair and anger vs hope and service, where Jesus entered, no one could keep him down.”
“Sacred and defiant! The wicked unjust exercise of power meant to terrify the world intersected defiant love, justice, mercy, forgiveness.” Though momentarily caught in a moment of rebellion, I quickly surrendered. “For the death of His Son, God could have wiped out the world in its entirety. But. That is not what he promised. It is not what Jesus lived.”
Another, scattered in the night, jogged past us at a distance as if we may pose a potential threat to them.
“He promised to rise from the dead. Rising from the dead is unnatural,” I stated as a matter of fact. “Death is natural. Loss is natural. Grief is natural. When a human being goes into the ground, that is that. You do not wait around for the person to reappear so you can pick up where you left off. The only place springtime happens in a cemetery is on the graves, not in them.”4
“Life is a continuum. Why can’t rise be natural? God planted a seed of life in us that cannot be killed.” The stranger paused.
“At death, something left the earth. The words we have are so thin. Life, soul, the miraculous energy that drives bone and meat toward love and light, … gone.” We passed a cross street as a dog howled in the background.
“But not gone! Is there a wilder, crazier, truer belief than rising?” the stranger challenged, eyes enthralled. “And if life is miraculous opening, why cannot death be a miraculous opening also?”5
“God embraced the human condition with the birth of his Son. Despite our muck, he still embraces us. He rose above. And now He’s pulling us out of our own tombs. Love conquers the cross and will continue to do so!”
“You heard Jesus tell you, ‘I am going away and I will come back to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, trust in God and trust in me.' (John 14:28) To rise is natural, but will only become an expectation when we give mercy, provide peace, and offer forgiveness.”
We began to enter the light beneath another post. The stranger paused to allow another to scurry into the distant darkness. “This I know; Jesus is who he said he was. He spoke and acted in the person of Christ. He in person was/is/will continue to be the highest good. Our sins He forgives. He first shows his wounds – then, no vengeance but wishes us peace. He shows who is our King and what our mission should be. How do we approach darkness? Through service to each other we become light of the Eucharist. Jesus’ light breaks through the darkness. Jesus did this in the midst of darkness in the world, betrayal, deceit, trial, death.”6
The burden with which I started my walk began to lighten.
“Jesus’ resurrection liberates us, validates the Kingdom among us is now! Jesus has every intention of going head to head with our false gods; Jesus does not wait until life-after-life to deal with you and me. Get rid of the idea that the kingdom Jesus proclaimed is purely other worldly. New life is intended to begin now; it has to do not only with where we live and how we work, what we eat and drink, but also with where our neighbor lives, especially those neighbors who would gladly feed upon the crumbs from our groaning tables.”7
“We are part of the Kingdom of God here and now! We must commit and act to care for our world and to provide for all of creation. We must be the forces of freedom, justice, truth, love. We are obligated to care for the jewel of the universe, planet earth, to resist greed, to quit worshipping the false gods of greed, power, racial and economic bias, threatening egos, injustice, fame, privilege, abuse of class-neighbor-children- spouse, meanness. Without humility, integrity, mercy, forgiveness, all lead to a fear of death … all lead to doubt in resurrection.”
Together under heavy mist, we enter light beneath a streetlamp. Water dropped from the bill of the stranger’s cap. He reached into his pocket and pulled forth a piece of crusted bread. He broke it in two and gave half to me.
The stranger opened me. “I delivered the Kingdom. It was not you who chose me, but I who chose you. (John 15:16) As the Father loves me, so I also love you. Love one another as I love you.” (John 15:9-10)
Overcome, I felt Metanoeo! I felt the One walking beside me challenging me to revolutionize my way of thinking, acting, being. Turn my thinking inside out and let my feelings and behavior follow suit.8
Before I could respond, tears welled in my eyes as he touched my face. “Do not be afraid. I have risen!” Whereupon He vanished from my sight! (Luke 24:31)
In heavy mist, I turned to return home to Jerusalem.
As I age, I have tried to turn my expectations of the world more to myself. I have been asked by many students and adults of various faiths if Catholics stand before their congregations to proclaim they’ve been saved. My response; yes. Every time I accept the Eucharist, I proclaim Jesus is Lord and Savior. I also renew my efforts to give myself to Christ and all of creation that Christ is within!
I celebrate in thanksgiving being immersed often in the gifts of life. I ponder life’s experiences. From Mystery, all I know and experience came to be. To Mystery, I will return and continue to experience.
“We are carved of immense confusing holiness that the whole point for us is grace under duress; and that you either take a flying leap at nonsensical illogical unreasonable ideas like marriage and marathons and democracy and divinity [and resurrection], or you huddle behind a wall. I believe that the coolest things there are cannot be measured, calibrated, gauged, weighed, or understood except sometimes by having a child patiently explain it to you, which is another thing that should happen far more often to us all.
In short, I believe in believing, which doesn’t make sense, which gives me hope.”9
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| "Be Good" painted by a child and placed on my path in the woods! |
Don’t be distracted or diverted. TAKE THESE TO FULL SCREEN! Be grateful and dance for a little time!!!
Where Love is Found by Daniel Schutte
Join in the Dance by Daniel Schutte
Peace!
1 Bishop Barron of Los Angeles, Good Friday online homily 2020.
2 Fr. John Kavanaugh, SJ Good Friday homily online 2011.
3 Russian author of Pride and Prejudice and philosopher, Dostoevsky, was asked this question.
4 Barbara Brown Taylor, author and Episcopal priest, from Give Us This Day, April 2020.
5 Brian Doyle, p. 61, Grace Notes, Catholic author and editor of Portland Magazine, University of Portland. Brian recently died of brain cancer at the age of 60.
6 Bishop Barron online homily Easter 2020.
7 Will Willimon, professor Christian ministry at Duke Divinity School, retired Methodist bishop. p. 12 Plough Quarterly, Spring 2020.
8 Sr. Mary M. McGlone, Sts of St. Joseph Carondelet, National Catholic Reporter, Fifth Sunday of Easter, Scripture for Life, May 9, 2020. ‘Metanoeo’ Peter uses Greek verb evangelizing in Acts of the Apostles.
9 Brian Doyle, p. 57, Grace Notes.
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