All Are Welcome

All are welcome, all are welcome, all are welcome, in His Name.

Public masses are open today in our archdiocese.  HALLELUIAH!  For me, this is a true blessing.  This morning I saw many of the same familiar faces that I recognized from my sporadic 6am daily mass attendance over the years.

I spent the past 2 month ducking into our church, open for adoration, at many different times.  Although each visit was a treasure, only once was I lucky enough to stumble in just as one of the priests was beginning to quietly celebrate his own private mass.  Just to witness the Sacrifice was a true spiritual treasure.  He was celebrating in Latin, and the 4 years I spent in Latin class in high school failed me completely.  He was practically whispering, and he was celebrating away from me, but it was amazing to be there to witness what was undeniably the Eucharistic Celebration…regardless of how it looked and how it sounded.

It had been 2 months since I had last received the Eucharist.  After receiving and returning to my pew, I felt a growing heat all over my body.  It was not a feeling of gentle warmness.  It was not a comfortable glow inside of me.  I became warmer and more uncomfortable as I prayed.  I cannot explain what happened, but if I can be so bold as to make an analogy, it felt like a fever quickly rising in me.  Just as a fever is your body’s reaction to infection, and works to burn away all that is impure, no matter how uncomfortable, I feel as if the grace of the Sacrament may have been burning my spiritual impurities.  As I finished my prayer, the fever that had grown inside of me immediately subsided.

The Source and Summit of our faith, the Eucharist, is now open to us.  It is a true blessing that dispensation has been extended as well.  Those at most risk, or those simply uncomfortable, can rest easy, without obligation.  I pray that I am prepared to continue to face public mass.  I have no worry or concern over the virus.  I know the risks, the studies, the guidelines, and act with open eyes in ways that I must personally choose, which are best for my family.  (Bear with me.)  I DO have concern with church…with my ability to stay focused on the miracle taking place at mass.

Is that blue tape, used to block off pews, going to hold up, or fall down by weekend masses?  That old guy isn’t even wearing a mask.  He’s gotta be 85, why is he here?  Who else is here?  I think I know that guy, but he looks like Jesse James getting ready to rob a train in that bandana.  Did someone just cough?  Did the priest just cough right in the middle of consecration?  When was he supposed to wear a mask?  Who’s wearing gloves?  Did I touch the pew?  These pews really need some new wood stain.  I wonder if the antibacterial cleaner is stripping off the finish.  Is the priest going to talk about all of this in his homily?  Would it be better if he did, or didn’t?  Are we going to wave at each other during the sign of peace?  Nevermind, we’re still skipping it.

Nothing in the above paragraph has anything to do with the true reason for attending mass.  It is all theater.  Unfortunately, it is theater I fear I may allow to distract me.  I reject that this is the ‘new normal’ we have to get used to.  I reject that premise, because once you get used to a new normal, then it just becomes ‘normal’.  There have been too many new social ‘normals’ in society over recent years that we are told we simply need to get used to.  Many of these new social normals fly directly in the face of our faith. 

I do not reject safety, but I do long for the day that I can celebrate mass with many smiling faces around me.  I long for the day I can exchange “peace” with the families sitting near me.  In the meantime, I do not accept the new normal, because I want to continue to remember these simple joys that come from being together within the community of the Body of the Church.  I do not want to gain a comfort with losing these, and want to continue to look forward to their return.  Until then, as always, I still long for the Eucharist. 

For those who cannot, or choose not, to join in the public Sacrifice of the Mass, I respect your situation, and I continue to pray for you.  For those who choose to attend, I warn you of the new theater that exists, which is ancillary to the mass.  Although we have seen it in public settings over the past months, they were foreign to me in the setting of mass, and these were a few of the thoughts and struggles that unfortunately distracted me.  Perhaps my sharing might help some of you be prepared so that you may better focus on what is truly important.  NOT to prepare you to get used to any new normal, but to allow you to isolate the theater that faces us, from the Mass we all used to know. 

I pray that we each may see the mass as a child.  Not with the immaturity of focus that would have us playing with blue tape on the pews and looking all around.  But rather, with the wonder and awe that comes with seeing the miracle before us on the alter, with fresh, innocent eyes, an innocent faith, and the ability to have tunnel vision towards that Sacrifice, while being (reverently) oblivious to all that surrounds us.    

Matt Buehrig