Why Personality Matters

How often do you sit in your chair and think how every day words and actions are perceived by others? Are you generally a thankful person, sharing your optimism with a gleaming smile across your face? Do you laugh often? Do you offer genuine compliments to others with no ulterior motive? Do you go above and beyond to help those with whom you work to make their day a tad less stressful?

There is a certain level of awareness required to not only notice others around you and how they're feeling, but also what they're thinking. This can be a challenge for many. In addition to such outward social challenges, to make authentic social life even more exciting, how well-versed are you at identifying your own shortcomings real-time and then correcting them on the fly? Are you prepared to battle your worst personality habits to better yourself around others?

Recently, I became interested in understanding the science behind emotional intelligence in an effort to better myself and my social contributions. My eyes were drawn to a book stand in an airport one morning. As I browsed titles on the shelf, a blue book titled, "On Emotional Intelligence" smacked my eyeballs. I picked it up and couldn't put it down. So, they made me buy it to avoid being a thief. In this book, there are a compilation of 10 scientific writings on emotional intelligence, specifically to become a better leader. These principles don't apply only to business leadership, but all areas of life involving a social interaction. Be a better leader at home with your children. Be a better leader among your circle of friends. Be a better leader in your faith community.

I don't want to give a synopsis of the compilation, but to be brief, successful leadership boils down to five key skills:

• Self-Awareness
• Self-Regulation
• Motivation
• Empathy
• Social Skill

Utilizing a well-exercised strategy for interpersonal relationship building is challenging for most. It requires constant evaluation and interior critiquing while accepting suggestions and criticisms from others. It requires humility and the abandonment of one's ego. It requires checks and balances from those who know you well enough to call you out.

The constant movement towards improvement should be present throughout our lives as we mature and begin to understand what's really important. Relationships drive our world. Relationships, more often times than luck, determine our legacy. Success can be measured in any number of ways. However, history's true measure of success isn't measured by fleeting wealth or beauty. Rather, history teaches us that success is shown by one's ability to influence those around us to do more than expected.