When Was the Last Time You Went to Confession?

by Mike Hey

2 Corinthians 5:18-21 “And all this is from God, who has reconciled us to himself through Christ and given us the ministry of reconciliation, namely, God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting their trespasses against them and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. So we are ambassadors for Christ, as if God were appealing through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.”

At one time in the not too distant past it had been 40 years for me, at least. Standing outside Father Anstoetter’s confessional that Saturday morning after PX90 was one of the longest 10 minutes of my life. This was the last remaining roadblock of my return to the Church and I was determined to get through it. Standing there thinking about what I might possibly confess (my memory sucks); I remembered the prayer passage like it was yesterday; “Bless me Father for I have sinned. It has been A LONG TIME since my last confession”! To this day receiving that long-awaited absolution was one of the best things that ever happened to me. It literally was like the weight of the world being lifted off of me, and I had completed my journey home.

God calls us to live a life of virtue; to ultimately stand in the light of His face. Unfortunately, virtue is under constant attack from forces of our world. We are human, fallen, and therefore sinners. Our Lord, and the Church in its wisdom knew of the power of forgiveness and has blessed us with the Sacrament of Penance and Reconciliation, a fundamental tenet of our faith. The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC 1440) defines this sacrament as “Sin is before all else an offense against God, a rupture of communion with him. At the same time it damages communion with the Church. For this reason conversion entails both God’s forgiveness and reconciliation with the Church, which are expressed and accomplished liturgically by the Sacrament of Penance and Reconciliation.”

Not only does the Sacrament of Penance free us from our sins but it also challenges us to have the same kind of compassion and forgiveness for those who sin against us. We are liberated to be forgivers, obtaining new insight into the words of the Prayer of St. Francis: "It is in pardoning that we are pardoned."

Jesus entrusted the ministry of reconciliation to the Church. The Sacrament of Penance is God's gift to us so that any sin committed after Baptism can be forgiven. In confession we have the opportunity to repent and recover the grace of friendship with God. It is a holy moment in which we place ourselves in His presence and honestly acknowledge our sins, especially mortal sins. With absolution, we are reconciled to God and the Church. The Sacrament helps us stay close to the truth that we cannot live without God.

There are four primary actions in the celebration of the Sacrament of Reconciliation, all of which contribute in the healing that takes place: confession of sin; expression of contrition or sorrow for sin; doing penance ("satisfaction"), which expresses a desire to avoid sin; and absolution from sin. Essentially there are two "movements" in the sacrament: our movement toward God and God's toward us.

Prior to confession, one should prepare themselves with an examination of conscience. This is a prayerful self-reflection on our words and deeds to determine how we may have sinned against God. There are various types of examinations of conscience but regardless of which one you use to prepare yourself for the sacrament it should be rooted in Scripture; particularly the Ten Commandments, and Beatitudes.

Confession entails admitting and naming one's sin. It is in this act that the penitent names his or her sins, acknowledging the judgment of God over his or her actions. For some, especially those who are celebrating the sacrament for the first time or after a long time (me), it may seem awkward, for it is difficult to admit one's faults. On a strictly human level, confessing one's sins can be a cathartic means of unburdening oneself of those burdens. Confession of sin should be integral and thorough, and the priest can be of assistance in guiding the penitent through the process. He can also offer counsel regarding the process of conversion from sin.

Contrition is one's expression of sorrow for sin. Simply approaching the Sacrament of Reconciliation can at some level be an expression of contrition. Contrition "occupies first place" in the work of the sacrament, but praying the "Act of Contrition" follows after the confession of sin. The Council of Trent defined contrition as "heartfelt sorrow and aversion for the sin committed along with the intention of sinning no more". The sinner expresses the desire for a right relationship with God, which entails doing God's will. Contrition comes about through understanding the nature of one's relationship with God as an invitation and a call to discipleship, and an awareness of the ways in which one has not lived up to that call. The sinner who desires God's forgiveness seeks the Lord, because he or she recognizes that overcoming sin and resisting temptation come not from one's own abilities but with God's help.

Satisfaction for sin is the way in which the sinner shows his or her "firm purpose of amendment," which means that the sinner demonstrates by action the intention to heal the harm done by sin. When someone harms another, the process of reconciliation in that relationship entails making restitution, and that gesture in itself is a healing remedy. In the celebration of the sacrament, the priest offers the penitent a suggested act of penance as a means of making satisfaction. Often a penance involving prayer or devotion is directed, because such prayer helps the sinner reorient his or her life to the presence of Jesus Christ and his love for the sinner, which flows from his Cross.

Absolution from sin is offered by the priest acting in the person of Christ. The real power of the sacrament is this incarnational moment, as the healing power of Christ in his forgiveness is given a real face and a real voice in the person of the priest. One can pray to God to ask forgiveness anytime, and all are encouraged to do so as a means of seeking and finding forgiveness for minor everyday faults (i.e., venial sins), but only in the sacramental celebration is that gift of forgiveness offered in such concrete form. The priest's prayer of absolution states, "Through the ministry of the Church, may God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit." This makes clear the prayer for God's gifts ("of pardon and peace"), but the declaration, "I absolve you," is far more powerful than an invocation or request for forgiveness. The power to offer absolution has its roots in Jesus' giving the authority to forgive to the Apostles (Mt 16:19; Jn 20:23).

The process of seeking, receiving, and celebrating God's mercy and forgiveness is a source of joy. It is difficult to admit one's faults, and sometimes even more difficult to ask forgiveness. Pope Francis, however, reminds us that it need not be something to fear, because the Lord is always ready and eager to bestow his healing love:

Whenever we take a step toward Jesus, we come to realize that he is already there, waiting for us with open arms. Now is the time to say to Jesus: "Lord, I have let myself be deceived; in a thousand ways I have shunned your love, yet here I am once more, to renew my covenant with you. I need you. Save me once again, Lord, take me once more into your redeeming embrace." How good it feels to come back to him whenever we are lost! Let me say this once more: God never tires of forgiving us; we are the ones who tire of seeking his mercy.

Since that morning in 2013 regular Reconciliation is part of my faith tool chest. Our Lord prepared for his ministry by spending 40 days in the wilderness. As Lent approaches this is our opportunity to address our own “wildernesses”. It’s not that hard or time-consuming, and believe me, you will feel better. As a PX90 brother we are all called to faithfully challenge each other. So gentlemen, in the immortal words of my late father; “get your ass up to Confession”!

James 5:16 “So then, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you will be healed.”